u care what i think

A job only a hipster could do

zzymurgy — Wed, 04 Apr 2012 02:13:57 +0000

Are you hipsterphobic? Hipsterphile? Hipstamatic? You might be closer to hipstertown than you thought.

If you have one of these jobs, you’re probably a hipster:

Projectionist
Graphic designer
Publisher
Art critic
Art teacher
Photographer
Art gallery employee
Owner of a vintage clothing shop
Food truck cook
Barista in a clothing shop
Hairdresser
Bicycle mechanic

If you have one of these jobs, you’re probably NOT a hipster:

PE teacher
maths teacher
Librarian
Real estate agent
Travel agent
Finance or insurance broker
Segway technician
Landscape gardener
Garbage collector
IT analyst
athlete

A work in progress. Suggestions welcome.

Coca-Cola kills

zzymurgy — Fri, 09 Mar 2012 14:02:49 +0000

So there I was, in a WOMADelaide moshpit enjoying Chic play the greatest songs they’ve written for other bands. Some INXS, some Bowie, some Madonna, pretty good stuff. I was pulling some sweet moves, obediently clapping along, trying to avoid the mum in front of me who kept rocking out into me, and generally minding my own business, as they say.

When all of a sudden, I glanced to my left to see a half-full Coca-Cola bottle hurtling towards me through the crowd. Having retarded reaction time, I could do nought but stare transfixed, helplessly, as it soared over my head and split a hole in my forehead.

Seriously, does stuff like this ever happen to anyone else? My life’s FAR too interesting.

How to order a VPL

zzymurgy — Sun, 19 Feb 2012 07:59:32 +0000

Every time I see this ad, I wonder how much thought was given to the name of this beer. Sure, it might be pale in colour, it might be a lager, and it might be made in Victoria, but who’s going to order a VPL at a bar – and not get slapped?!
Might as well order a Gaytime while you’re there.

And I wasn’t even going to mention this, but this picture? The most popular guy in the group has just told a hilarious joke. Everyone’s looking at him. So they cover him up with a huge picture of a beer bottle? And not even a very interesting beer bottle at that.

Are advertising companies even trying these days?

Witness the Fitness

zzymurgy — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 07:42:33 +0000

There’s a lot to love about this music video, and it’s not just the cool dub anthem.

It reminds me so much of myself, the fact that I wasn’t much of an athlete in school, but now I’m so much fitter than I’ve been in a long time. I’ve really been enjoying the incredibly steep Mt Lofty hikes, energy-eating soft-sand beach walks, and exhilarating heart-pounding bus-dodging city bike rides. I even caught myself breaking into a jog yesterday! Can’t remember the last time I was so fit and healthy!

(And yet I don’t own a single piece of athletic clothing, except the white shoes of course. I don’t need separate clothes just to sweat in.)

At the end of every particularly grueling sweat session, I can hear myself muttering as I gasp for breath, “witness the fitness”, “witness the fitness”.

Watch the video all the way to the end, then you’ll see why I enjoy it so much.

Discoloured discharge, mmm

zzymurgy — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 11:07:22 +0000

I can’t think of any situation where ‘discoloured water’ could be a good thing.

Judgement Day

zzymurgy — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 11:05:47 +0000

I received this from SkyNet today. You won’t believe what was inside…

Bananas. Tandem skydiving. With Stockholm Syndrome.

zzymurgy — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 03:07:22 +0000

HOWTO: work on those ego issues with your number plate

zzymurgy — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 06:11:53 +0000

Small coffee or huge hands?

zzymurgy — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 21:20:02 +0000

or maybe a bit of both?

Everyone loves Adelaide

zzymurgy — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 10:07:42 +0000

How was this ad never picked up by Tourism SA? We’ll never know.
PS. Adelaide rocks. But it’s not for the faint-hearted.